Marty Haugen & David Haas: Tagteam of Terror

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I'm writing this post as I look over the list of songs I sang today at Mass...

Today at Mass all of our hymns were written and composed by Marty Haugen and David Haas. I don't think I ever laughed so hard at mass in my life, nor have I ever more considered NOT taking the cantor training this year. We sang four 'hymns' The first, has been thoroughly torn apart by Victor Lams. I'm of course talking about "All Are Welcome". After I had my first laugh at the entrance 'hymn' we sang through the penitential right and the Gloria, sang the Psalm response and Gospel Acclamation until we get to...

Amazin' Grace for the Preparation of Gifts! Looks like I was wrong. One song isn't written by the tagteam of terror. I admit, I do like Amazing Grace, however, it's not appropriate for mass, it's protestant and it's not directed toward God but to the fellow parishioners. The sheet says that we're supposed to trade off the second and third verses between the men and women and sing the fourth verse "in canon" like "row row row your boat". It didn't help improve anything. I promise you.

Our Communion Hymns

Jesus, Wine of Peace by David Haas. Yes, "Wine of Peace". It's like "Bread of Life" only hippier. I specifically remember when Jesus said, "I am the wine of peace. Those who come to me shall not argue." This song is crap. The song switches between the point of view of the parishioners and Jesus' point of view. You know, when we sing at Mass, aren't the songs supposed to be worshipping God? What does it say about us when we're singing from God's point of view? Think about that.

Next Now In This Banquet by Marty Haugen. Marty doesn't even bother rhyming the refrain or the first and second verses of this monument of crap. Once he switches to rhyming mode around verse three we get such winners as "today" and "in your way", and "blind" and "kind" for verse four. This is now an open appeal to Marty Haugen. Marty, please stop. Music is NOT your calling. I don't care how rich you're getting off of it. You suck at it. Please, for the love of God (seriously), STOP WRITING MUSIC!

We finally ended mass with David Haas and Marty Haugen teaming up to bring us All The Ends of The Earth! Actually, this song isn't bad. These two should team up more often if it can keep them from writing the usual egocentric crap that they write as solo composers. The focus is on God, it doesn't change back and forth between God's point of view and ours. The song is lifted from Psalm 98. Now, if only they could write it so that it could be sung by the normal human range. Also, it would be an added plus if it wasn't in a jazzy 6/8 time. I wonder if people who can't read music go blind looking at this song. There's so many notes in here you wonder how they figured out how to sing it in the first place.

I know God gave me a gift for singing. But I wonder why He has me waste it on Marty Haugen and David Haas. I'm done now. I just needed to get this off my chest.

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This page contains a single entry by Robert Diaz, MI published on September 7, 2003 1:54 PM.

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